Spoiler alert: I haven't died yet... but this is a long and heavy post. Skip it if you are in the mood for a giggle. Giggles to come in future posts, I promise.
Wow, I was meant to read this today. I almost didn't, then I did, and reading this felt like a message. I also have people pleasing tendencies (mostly unconscious - I'm fine saying no to people, but I often prioritise others' priorities over mine without thinking), and - yes, I'm a Catholic (lapsed but it's engrained). I've also been constantly ill the last eighteen months, but with no signs as to why (ahem.. until now).
All that's my way of saying thanks for sharing this encounter, it's really powerful. I really related to your stream of conscious and responses to Mate, and it's helpful to see how others have these moments of realisation in 'real-time' through the interview.
'There's no Christ in Christianity' really resonated with me... maybe he is right and Jesus' teachings were completely different...? Great post Marianne!
Another stellar post. When I became really ill with the immune system disease sarcoidosis, it mirrored where I was shut down emotionally. I think things had gotten so bad with me, my body ran out of options. The day after I began an affair with my colleague, I woke up struggling to see out of one eye. Blinding pain. Weeks before, I’d ignored a lump in my finger, also, incidentally, during another period of emotional stress. As I lied to myself, my sight worsened. I could barely read a Tube map or street sign right in front of me. Everything I was suppressing and evading through my people pleasing life came to a head.
I loved reading this Marianne - a real AHAH! moment. I’ve been sharing fake yeses due to family expectations for decades. “people pleasing is a survival adaptation which becomes woven into the personality.” Wow ...I can actually identify the reasons behind it too - like a light turned on after a deep sleep. I just said no to a family request and felt sick as I received the disappointed reaction I expected... so guilt set in. Time to plan a guilt party!
Wow, I was meant to read this today. I almost didn't, then I did, and reading this felt like a message. I also have people pleasing tendencies (mostly unconscious - I'm fine saying no to people, but I often prioritise others' priorities over mine without thinking), and - yes, I'm a Catholic (lapsed but it's engrained). I've also been constantly ill the last eighteen months, but with no signs as to why (ahem.. until now).
All that's my way of saying thanks for sharing this encounter, it's really powerful. I really related to your stream of conscious and responses to Mate, and it's helpful to see how others have these moments of realisation in 'real-time' through the interview.
'There's no Christ in Christianity' really resonated with me... maybe he is right and Jesus' teachings were completely different...? Great post Marianne!
Another stellar post. When I became really ill with the immune system disease sarcoidosis, it mirrored where I was shut down emotionally. I think things had gotten so bad with me, my body ran out of options. The day after I began an affair with my colleague, I woke up struggling to see out of one eye. Blinding pain. Weeks before, I’d ignored a lump in my finger, also, incidentally, during another period of emotional stress. As I lied to myself, my sight worsened. I could barely read a Tube map or street sign right in front of me. Everything I was suppressing and evading through my people pleasing life came to a head.
Love this Marianne, thank you.
I loved this, Marianne. It feels very relevant for me at the moment. Thank you for sharing.
I loved reading this Marianne - a real AHAH! moment. I’ve been sharing fake yeses due to family expectations for decades. “people pleasing is a survival adaptation which becomes woven into the personality.” Wow ...I can actually identify the reasons behind it too - like a light turned on after a deep sleep. I just said no to a family request and felt sick as I received the disappointed reaction I expected... so guilt set in. Time to plan a guilt party!